I guess it is really true, as u get older the less daring u become.
Am i becoming one?
This year I'm at already 25, 1 quarter of my life gone.. though no regrets but i have accomplish nothing, no future, no companion, no money, no career... no nothing. So what have i been doing all this while?
Seriously... if I wan to put it into words, I have been enjoying everything bits of my life with the ups n downs that i have been through.
Maybe i can start finding a companion for myself, but i have no quality that attracts good guys i guess, or any guys at all.
A family is what every girls want, but for me i guess i prefer having a baby more than having a husband. I mean I guess I have a high expectation. What do u wan from a husband, your companion, soulmate, best friends? I dunno, taking care or me = but i can do that myself, be there for me through my ups n downs = my 5 babies and my family can be there too, to love me = refer to the previous answer, the list can go on n on n on but my answer basically will be same. I know my family cannot always be there for me forever, especially my parents but to complete trust that someone not to betray you, or hurt you in anyway, to love you for who u are no matter u are fat, thin, bitchy, stupid, lazy etc, like your family, do u think i can find one?
I dunno. Lately a lot of friends are getting married one by one, but me still all alone. This kinda sucks.
To have something that i wan badly i may have to give up ona lot of others things.........
Is it worth it? I dunno, i really dunno............
Am i doing the right thing? I also dunno...
There is nothing that I know or i should say I am in control of...
I am scared... having all the negative thoughts in me...
In the end, I decided to pursue what my heart tell me to...
No regrets for me even though if in the end I fell into deep shit.
May whoever is up there bless me with all the luck I need.
Jade
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